Beautiful ScrapsThe Self Improvement Blog

A famous quotes says Early to bed, early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise. This quote is true to a great extent. In this post I will try to explain 3 things that you must do every morning after you wake up. Sleeping for a minimum of 7 hours is extremely important to proper functionality of human body. After a long tiring day, nothing beats the stress better than a good night sleep.

Sleep is a state of mind, where the human brain relaxes and saves all the important information into memory cells. This is one of the reason why we have dreams. Coming back to our topic I have listed the 3 tasks before you start your day.

My great day came and went, I do not know how.  Because it did not pass through dawn when it came, nor through dusk when it went. - Antonio Porchia

Pray to God:
You may or may not believe in god, but I am a strong believer. Every morning I get up, I thank god  for keeping me healthy so far. Pray for your friends and family and end the prayer with asking for a successful day. Praying installs a confidence into us. At the back of mind, we have thought running that God will take care of the day and the day will be a great one.

Work it out :
A 30 minutes work out a day is enough to keep you away from most of the health related diseases. Dedicate minimum of 30 minutes for daily work outs. These workout will prepare the body for the days stress and also make you feel more energetic and confident to take on with your tasks.  If you are planning to join a gym, these tips will help you get started. Make sure you exercise before having your breakfast. If you are not comfortable doing workouts, you can opt for yoga.

Plan your day :
It is very important to plan your day ahead. In your mind browse through all the pending work left or any new work which you are going to take out and also plan on how to it finish off. Planning ahead will give you an extra edge over your competitors. Some of the common points can be

1. What time I am supposed to reach my office/school.
2. How do I commute? Is my vehicle in fine condition ?
3. Do I have to meet/call anyone before going to office/school ?
4. Do I have to pay any pending bills etc?
5. Is there any pending work left at office/school ?
6. What could be the possible work which I would have to do at office/school.?
7. Do I have any appointment with doctor/layer/client etc ?
8. What time work will get over and I will be back home.
9. Is there any evening party ? Or are you expecting any friends or relative?
10. Anything which I missed ?

You can even write it down and keep it as a to-do list for each day. Some people have the habit of writing diaries to record there daily schedules. It may take some extra time, but it will make sure you wont miss anything.
All these tasks are important to prepare us for the day’s work. At the end of the day, evaluate what you could or couldn’t do.  Try it for a week, and you will start seeing amazing results in your day to day life. Have a great day.

Image Source : Flickr

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This theory was proposed by Abraham Maslow in the year 1943 in his paper “A Theory of Human Motivation”. This theory is theory of needs, which explains the five levels of human needs. If all these needs are satisfied you can assured to be a highly satisfied and successful person in the society. In this post we will see each level of need in detail and try to understand the true meaning behind it.

“A champion needs a motivation above and beyond winning.” - Pat Riley

The 5 major needs identified by Abraham Maslow were Physiological needs, Safety needs, Social needs, Esteem needs and Growth needs. The Physiological need is the most basic need and is mandatory for the survival. This need form the base to other needs. The 4 needs i.e. Physiological, Safety, Social and Esteem are also called us the Deficiency needs or the D-Needs. Shortage in these needs can make the person Anxious and tense. Now let’s see each needs in further details

Physiological Needs :

This is also the most basic need but also the most important need. Physiological need mainly consists of

• Breathing
• Drinking
• Eating
• Sex
• Excretion

The Physiological needs are usually common for all living animals. These are the basic survival needs, I don’t think I need to explain much here. Lets move on to the next need.

Safety Need :

These needs get second priority. This need basically deals with survival. How we survive in our society, work, etc. The Safety need includes safety from

• Personal injuries or health risks.
• Lack of job.
• Shortage of resources.
• Problems in family.

The levels of hierarchy are such that once the lower level of need is met the person moves up the hierarchy to meet the next need. Incase any need from lower need is not met, he gives priority and tries to meet that need first.

Social Need :

If these needs are met, the person is satisfied that he is socially accepted. This need includes the love and affection he needs from his near and dear’s. The human behaviour lot depends on this level of need. A person who is deprived from Social Need in early part of his life can have serious Physiological problems.

This level of need includes

• Love from Friendship.
• Affection of family.
• Sexual Intimacy.

Esteem Needs :

This level determines how he is accepted into the society. Education plays an important role, to fulfill this need. A highly educated man is readily accepted by the society and respected. Self-respect and respect for others determine a person’s esteem. Esteem needs can come in blood if you are born into a Royal Family. In the sense, you are naturally accepted as a person who should be highly respected, just because you were born in a royal family.

Another place where esteem can be a problem is at work. At, work we meet many people of same respect level. A shortage in this respect level can be de-motivating and can create friction among two people.

Growth Need :

This need is the need to excel in the field of intrest. Growth needs are further divided into 3 sub needs

• Cognitive needs
• Aesthetic needs
• Self-actualization

To excel in field of intrest it is human tendency to explore new things and there by updating his level of knowledge. By gaining new knowledge, person becomes more intelligent.  Cognitive need explains why a person always explores the world around him to understand it better. May this need is one of the reason you are reading this post.

Self-Actualization is the instinctual need of humans to make the most of their abilities and to strive to be the best they can. Working toward fulfilling our potential, toward becoming all that we are capable of becoming.

Maslow writes the following of self-actualizing people:

• They embrace the facts and realities of the world (including themselves) rather than denying or avoiding them.
• They are spontaneous in their ideas and actions.
• They are creative.
• They are interested in solving problems; this often includes the problems of others. Solving these problems is often a key focus in their lives.
• They feel a closeness to other people, and generally appreciate life.
• They have a system of morality that is fully internalized and independent of external authority.
• They have discernment and are able to view all things in an objective manner.

The maslow’s theory of need may explain why we do some of the things that we do. As I mentioned previously in the post that a person who can meet all these needs is highly successful . He leads a very fulfilling life that inspires others to follow him.

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This movie has a very nice self motivating song. This song is sung by Bryan Adams. The situation of this song is “Spirit” the Stallion is carried far away from his family, he gets totally depressed and even doesn’t eat the grass provided by his friends who are also taken away. At this point he self-motivates himself to get back to his family and free his friends.

Video : Sound the Bugle now

Lyrics of the song :

Sound the bugle now - play it just for me
As the seasons change - remember how I used to be
Now I can’t go on - I can’t even start
I’ve got nothing left - just an empty heart

I’m a soldier - wounded so I must give up the fight
There’s nothing more for me - lead me away…
Or leave me lying here

Sound the bugle now - tell them I don’t care
There’s not a road I know - that leads to anywhere
Without a light feat that I will - stumble in the dark
Lay right down - decide not to go on

Then from on high - somewhere in the distance
There’s a voice that calls - remember who your are
If you lose yourself - your courage soon will follow

So be strong tonight - remember who you are
Ya you’re a soldier now - fighting in a battle
To be free once more -Ya that’s worth fighting for

If you haven’t seen the movie yet. I highly recommend this movie for your family and friends. You can get the DVD from Amazon.

Making a new friend is pretty easy, but maintaining such friendship becomes very tough at times. Misunderstandings are the primary reason why most of the friendship breaks. A broken friendship can leave many bitter moment. But the beauty of friendship is any bitter thoughts between each other can be shooed away by a simple “sorry”.

“An apology is the superglue of life. It can repair just about anything.” - Lynn Johnston

But who says sorry can make all the difference. It is not wrong on your part to say sorry, even if the fault was not from your side. But to make or break friendship it requires two people. So directly or indirectly you might be involved for the differences. It is not a good feeling to be disliked by someone, at one point of time in life we will surely miss them. If you know, the fault was from your side confess to your fault and ask him/her sorry by heart. Initially he/she might not consider your apology by later they will surely. There are different way you can ask sorry to a friend

Say sorry with a Gift :

Before you are going to say sorry, make sure you are carrying a gift or a card at least. Specially, if your friend is a girl these gifts matter a lot. For a guy a simple hug will do, but girls expect some gifts to remember the moment.

When you say sorry mean it :

If you are saying sorry to someone, mean it. Never say sorry just for the heck of it or just to please the person. If you are sorry mean it or just don’t say it yet.

Look into his/her eyes :

When you are asking sorry look into persons eye. This will make them understand that you really meant your sorry, because eyes can speak more than what we think. Open your eyes wide when asking sorry, and search for the answer in his/her eyes. If he/she is looking into your eyes, your apologies are almost sure to be accepted.

Don’t make a fuss about it:

Do talk about the issue to clear why the mis understanding occured. But don’t drag it too long as it will only end up blaming each other and soon you will be back to square one. Respect each other’s point of view and tell what you felt and thought.

Ask sorry man o man :

Try your best to ask the person sorry face to face. This way, you will be able to express your feelings better. Asking sorry on phone, chat, e-mail can sound easy but don’t have the same effect as face to face.

If you are staying far from your friend or can’t meet him/her for some reason, I would recommend you send them a personalized e-card.

Always remember as an old saying says.. ” It is better to be late, than never “.

image source : Flickr

We humans always complain even for the slightest of discomfort we face. The smallest scratch on our arms makes us go mad at the person responsible for it. Now, Imagine this if you were born with your limbs. Yes, no legs or hands. Whom will you curse now GOD ? or would you think I would die rather ?

” God didn’t have time to make a nobody, only a somebody.I believe that each of us has God-given talents within us waiting to be brought to fruition. ”

In this post I will tell you about a man who faced the exact same fate. His name is Nick Vujicic , He was first born child into his devout Serbian Christian family, Nick Vujicic was born in Sunnybank, Brisbane, Australia, limbless, missing both arms at shoulder level, and having one small foot with two toes protruding from his left thigh. Initially his parents were devastated, however Nick turned out to be otherwise perfectly healthy.

His life was filled with difficulties and hardships. One such hardship was not being able to attend a mainstream school because of his physical disability, as the law of Australia required, even though he was not mentally impaired. During his schooling, the laws were changed, and Nick was one of the first disabled students to be migrated to a mainstream school.Being bullied at his school, Nick grew extremely depressed, and by the age of eight, started contemplating suicide. After begging God to grow arms and legs, Nick eventually began to realize that his accomplishments were inspirational to many, and began to thank God he was alive. When he was seventeen, he started to give talks at his prayer group, and eventually starting his non-profit organization, Life Without Limbs.

Nick graduated from college at the age of 21 with as a double major in Accounting and Financial Planning. He began his travels as a motivational speaker, focusing on the topics that today’s teenagers face. He also speaks in the corporate sector, however his aim is to become an international inspirational speaker, in both Christian and non-Christian venues. He regularly travels internationally to speak to Christian congregations, schools, and corporate meetings. He has spoken on four continents (Africa, Asia, Australia, and North America), in over 12 countries, and to over two million people face to face.

Well this is his story, and I am totally inspired by his story. He is a direct testimonial to mind over matter. There is nothing bad that can ever happen which makes you quit. Being born in this cruel world without limbs by itself is the worst thing that can ever happen to a human being, but even after being born so today he is a successful man and is financially independent. He used his biggest disability to his biggest strength. Not only he is financially independent he is being blessed by millions of people across the world for changing there life forever.

To reach more people he is currently writing a book titled “No Arms, No Legs, No Worries”. His company “Attitude Is Altitude” also sells a DVD about his life. If you are planning to support his Non-Profit organization do get involved.

From his story we can learn

• Life can be really un fare at times. How we take it can make all the difference.
• Never say quit. Remember there is always a better future waiting for you.
• Nothing is impossible.
• If you think can do it, you will do it.
• Don’t hide your emotions, express them.
• Believe in your self at all times.

Next Time You Think Life is Hard.Think Again!

Conversation is probably the best thing that ever happened to a human. We all connect and bond with each other using speech. We talk with friends, family, enemy, stranger as it is one the primary way to express ourselves. With speech comes languages, around the world there are more than 6000 languages spoken at any point of time. In India itself more than 400 languages are spoken and many more languages still unclassified. Even after having so many beautiful languages to talk we still hesitate to talk.

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Conversation should be pleasant without scurrility, witty without affectation, free without indecency, learned without conceitedness, novel without falsehood. - William Shakespeare

In this blog post I will try to share 5 tips on how to talk to anyone. If we observe the pattern closely, most of the successful person have been good talkers.

Starting a conversation :

Ever wondered why ? When you meet a person and all you could say to him/her was a simple “hi”. How to take a conversation beyond that point can make all the difference. It requires one of the person involved to initiate the conversation. Most of the time, none of them initiate any conversation and just pass by. The best part of starting a conversation is you don’t need a reason to do it. You can just stop by and even comment on that person’s dress to start a conversation. Once the conversation starts, rest will automatically flow in and fall in place.

The point that I wanted to mention here is, don’t expect the other person to start a conversation. Do it yourself, and the next time you meet that person he/she will be the one to start it.

Make them feel like you knew them forever :

If you have observed some people, when they talk you feel as if you knew them forever. They come close to you very soon, and you find much comfortable talking with them. The reason is because, they talk that way. If you can be one, you can make lots of new friends and even strike many successful business deals. It all starts with your body language, don’t feel defensive when you meet a person for the first time. Feel relaxed, observe the way he talks to his friends.

If he is already in a conversation and you were just watching the proceeding of the conversation, interrupt the conversation by expressing your point of view. Try not to comment against that person, support him/her with your point of view. This will install immediate trust for you in there mind. The person will then add your point and try to continue the conversation and expecting you to support him/her more. Once that conversation is over, you can either greet each or conclude the same conversation in such a way that he/she is satisfied.

Avoid sounding like a jerk :

Jerk is sarcastic, mean, unforgiving and never misses an opportunity to make a cutting remark. People don’t like jerk’s as they can be sometimes too straight forward. Don’t be cursing a person always, be good and talk about there positive aspects. If you talk bad about a person to him/her, she will think he talks the same to others about me. If you have a comment or have to make a remark, keep it with yourself. Not all comments are liked and not all situations needs a comment.

Mind your phone manners :

Having a control over phone manners is extremely important. A conversation on phone doesn’t mean you can talk what you want to. On a phone it becomes more important to talk carefully, because a person can’t see your body language. A simple joke can be misunderstood as a sarcastic comment.

Don’t carry the phone conversation for too long, Once a person gets used to talk to you phone he/she will prefer to talk to you on phone. The reason for this is, they will feel more comfortable talking to you on phone than in real life. Nothing beats a face to face conversation.

Make them feel they are special to you :

Every person is different , they think and converse differently. It is important to understand people as individuals and converse according to them. Having a pesonilized touch in your conversation will make them feel special individually in the group. This feeling is important to them, because it makes them understand there importance in the group.

Everything that we do or ever did is to be happy. Happiness comes to us in various forms and types, but it goes away faster than it seems to stay. Having a happy mind will help you to be a better person and help you reach new heights.

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The road to happiness lies in two simple principles: find what it is that interests you and that you can do well, and when you find it, put your whole soul into it — every bit of energy and ambition and natural ability you have. - John D. Rockefeller III

Here, in this post I will try to mention the points that I follow to get happy and frankly speaking I am happy most of the times. We must also remember sadness is also an integral part of happiness. Happiness and sadness are like two faces of the same coin, by following these steps we are only increasing the probability of happiness. If we are happy at all point of life, we really can’t understand it’s true meaning.

Simplicity :

Simplicity is probably the biggest secret to a happy life. With our daily schedules, work environment, constant work stress, personal problems can make life really very complicated and confusing. The amount of complication multiplies as more and more people get in touch with us. The simple solution to this situation is don’t allow anyone and everyone to interfere in your personal life. Having a lots of friends is good, but close friends should always be few. It only sounds stupid when a person boasts saying, I have lots of close friends. To me it sounds like, I have lots of complications.

Don’t be too bothered about others :

Sounds too rude to be true, but it is. If you are too concerned about others, you are stressing yourself unnecessarily tensions and situations. This doesn’t mean you leave your near and dear’s into stress and wash you hands. They do require care and love . Unnecessary tension will only increase to your stress level.

Appreciate what you have :

Being contend with what we have, will generates a great level of satisfaction in life. Before thinking of people above you, think once about the people below you. But at the same time you need to be ambitious and prosper in a rightly manner. The success which you gain at someone’s expense won’t last longer and won’t be satisfying either.

Be fit and healthy :

A healthy body is equally important for a healthy mind. Exercising 3-4 times a week can really change you as a person. Make you more confident and energetic in the way you take things. If you are planning to join a gym do go through these starter’s tips which I mentioned earlier. Being healthy and fit doesn’t mean 6 pack abs or bulging chest. A simple Yoga exercise can lead you to a happy life. Stay away from addictive stuffs, drinks, drugs. They do please your mind but they make your brain so dependent on them, absence of it will make you stressed and unhappy.

Be independent :

Never expect anything from anyone, the reason most of the time we feel bad is we expected too much from them and got too little. Try to be as independent as possible, be a one man army. It is easy said than done. Try to minimize your dependence on other, love being yourself and do not change for anyone or anything. The more independent you become the lesser your expectations will be from others leading to lesser unhappy moments.

It can be a very painful experience for the person who has just come out of a broken relation. There can be several reasons that can lead to a broken relation, but the fate at the end of it are broken hearts. Mending a broken heart can be very difficult, requires lots of inner strength and lots of care from your near and dear ones. Some people who can’t find support from near ones usually turn to alcohol which can only do more harm than good.

The pain of having a broken heart is not so much as to kill you, yet not so little as to let you live.

In this post I will try to give 5 tips that will surely help you out in someway to come out of this stressful situation.

1) Erasing their memory

Erasing there memory can help speed up the healing process, every time we see there picture or the gifts they gave it reminds of all those bitter moments which we really want to forget. Remove his/her picture from the wallet/album and give it to someone else who can keep them safely untill you want them back. The question that might be raising in your mind is why would you want it back anyways ? The possible answer to this question can be, just because you had few bitter moments doesn’t mean you should forget those precious better moments that you had. Never ever distroy those memories as you may regret it later when you need them.

2) Alter you schedule

Make an abrupt change to your schedule, this will help you to forget his/her quickly. If we still follow the same schedule you will tend to remember him/her at a particular point of time for eg. when he/she used to call. Plan your schedule in such a way that you are keeping yourself busy at that point of time. Avoid the places where you people used to meet and spend time.

3) Get busy / Get a new hobby

A famous saying says ” An idle mind is a devils playground “. So based on this principal get yourself a new hobby. A hobby can really get you busy and make you feel better. A creative mind is far away from all stress and pain. The hobby you choose can be of your choice, some of the hobbies can be painting, gardening, collecting, photography etc. I would highly recommend gardening compared to other hobbies because it can really make you busy and nothing feels better than connecting to the nature.

4) Go out connect with friends

It is really important to connect to friends when you are broken from inside. Connecting to friends will help ease your pain. Share your pain with your friends and they will surely help you get out of it. Try to be in someone’s company at all time. This will keep you away from your ex partner’s thought. If you are one of those who doesnt like to go out much, you can make new friends via Social Networking websites like Orkut, Facebook, MySpace, etc.

5) Apply these Tips

You are really not helping yourself, if you are not applying the above said tips to your practical life. For applying these tips, you must first prepare yourself to come out of this situation. Once you have decided you are coming out of this situation, stick to it and soon you will realize you are back to normal kicking ass! Just imagine yourself how you were before this relation started. Just be yourself for no one can/should change you!!

Always remember there is always another day, another hope, another love!

After this post if I was able to mend one broken heart, I think I have done my job.

When was the last time when you sat to blog something and you got diverted. Which made you loose interest in the topic and you never blogged it again. Blogging requires some serious dedication and discipline. These are tough to achieve if you have too many diversions. A successful blogger is one who blogs regularly and is away from all diversions. In this post we will see what are the common cause of these diversions and how to overcome these diversions to help us save time.

The biggest diversion is our social network. When you are the most busy, everyone seems to be remembering you and start diverting you to the topic which they like to discuss. Which makes us to loose focus to our topic, ultimately loosing interest in the post itself. There can be situation when you are expecting someone at those times you can be in invisible mode. Let us see the various social interactions that can act as a diversion.

By prevailing over all obstacles and distractions, one may unfailingly arrive at his chosen goal or destination. -Christopher Columbus

Messenger service ( Yahoo, MSN, GTalk etc.)

These are probably the biggest trouble makers, mainly because of the reason other user can start an interaction. Even though you might not be interested to start an conversation they can start it and it would be too rude to tell them no. You can use a status message like “I’m Busy” etc. But it hardly adds any value. People will just buzz you to ask, what are you busy with? The best way to avoid this situation is by either staying invisible or signing off completely from the messenger service. If you still want to chat while working, turning off the chat sound would be of great help. So you can chat with them at your pleasure without much diversion.

Social networking websites ( Orkut, You tube, myspace etc.)

Another trouble maker are social networking websites. Sometimes as you will be busy blogging, just to check who’s online you login into your favorite social network only to be sucked up into it. It is a well known fact that social networking websites can be addictive. There is not much you can do this to avoid it. Couple of things that you can do is

• Use a url blocking software. Enable the software as you start blogging. So even if you enter the url it will be blocked which can remind you to resume your work.
• Another way to avoid this is by not using the browser itself. I always prefer to blog on a word processor first and then transfer it to wordpress. This way I don’t have to run my web browser until I am finished with the content.

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Manners are nothing but a set protocols set by this society for us to follow to be called as a civilized human being. Manners are every where, whether you talk, eat, dress or behave. If we notice manners is not much of a problem at home because we are naturally connected to our family and manners don’t play much of a role in the way we interact. Manners should not be confused with discipline, often most parents do. Manners are the set of rules and discipline is how we follow these manners. Most school teaches us only education, the manners we learn is from people with whom we interact on a daily basis.

The hardest job kids face today is learning good manners without seeing any.

 

Here are list of few manners which the community requires you to follow :

Phone Manners:

This is probably the most ignored form of manners. I have heard people screaming on phone. They scream so hard sometimes I wonder why they require the phone anyway! Here is the list of phone manners that most of us seem to ignore.

1. The first and the most important thing is to greet the person, instead of asking where he/she is now.
2. When you call someone, make sure to tell the reason for the call.
3. If you picked someone else call, mention your relation with the concerned person and ask if you can convey the message to concerned person.
4. Do not shout on the phone, you are just giving an uncivilized impression about yourself.
5. Do not be rude on phone, if you are not in the mood to talk either don’t pick the call or ask someone else to attend the call on your behalf.
6. Don’t keep the person on hold for too long. Everyone hates to be on hold.
7. If you have told someone on phone that you will call up later, don’t forget to call them back.
8. While talking on phone if you want to converse with someone near by make sure you cover the mouth piece of the phone. You surely don’t want them to be hearing what you are talking here.
9. At the end of the call thank the person for there time and promise to call later.
10. Keep the phone receiver back properly else you will not be getting calls until someone spots it.

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